shor-t's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Bears and Quilts I somehow found myself at my own wedding, being that I agreed to marry a plump, pimple faced Filipino girl whose name I never knew. It was awful. I tried to be happy but the entire time I was just thinking that I would have to divorce her. The ceremony was held at a pub somewhere with all of my friends and family. Nobody was paying attention though. While we waited for a priest to come, she presented me with a jujube pizza with pepperoni. Forget it. I was deeply insulted that she didn't even know or remember that I was a vegetarian. I tried to be nice about it and obviously ate nothing. The priest allowed us to exchange vows-I didn't understand hers and she was distracted while I said mine, which by the way were unforgiveable. Someone gave me a ring which I tried to put on her finger, but she wore a pair of queer gloves that the ring would not fit over. That was that, and I went to mingle amongst my friends. My father was there, not paying attention as usual. I went outside because there was an awful racket. Trees that had fallen in a recent storm were being cut up. I walked about, and saw a grizzly chasing Charo and Zelda. I knew that Charo could hold her own, but Zelda had no hope. I called Zelda and she eventually came, while Charo bit the grizzly in the face and fought with it. We ran to the nearest house and barged right in, because thankfully the door was wide open. Charo and the bear came closer and closer. I thought the bear was about to retreat when it started vomiting. The man of the house told me that was the way a bear marked his territory and that he'd be back. Charo came in, and I could smell the strong scent of vomit lingering in the air. Suddenly, the bear came through the door and attacked the dogs again. I hid behind the kitchen counter. I crept around a chair and poked my head straight up, which frightened the bear and he fainted. He also defecated and the smell was overwhelming. When I looked closer, it was a large macaque. I hate macaques. Later I went to work and was riding up the dodgy elevator. It did its didgy thing and I was able to get out on time. The 8th floor was a giant Christmas party, and Helen Weber was there with a large book made of quilt. I looked through it and it was very nice. Some of the pages were Christmas stockings. Some were family trees. One had the Matthews family on it. No sooner had I read it than did Wendy appear with Darcy Dallaire. Wendy was tired and I encouraged her to sleep, even though the bed was sick. I looked for a new shirt to wear and got out of that room as soon as possible. Mark was around and we talked about surfing. 8:47 a.m. - 2007-01-13 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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